Joan was quizzical
Studied pataphysical
Science in the home
Late nights all alone with a test tube, oh, oh, oh, oh
Maxwell Edison
Majoring in medicine
Calls her on the phone
"Can I take you out to the pictures, Joan?"
But as she's getting ready to go
A knock comes on the door
Bang, bang, Maxwell's silver hammer came down upon her head
Clang, clang, Maxwell's silver hammer made sure that she was dead
Back in school again
Maxwell plays the fool again
Teacher gets annoyed
Wishing to avoid an unpleasant scene
She tells Max to stay
When the class has gone away
So he waits behind
Writing fifty times "I must not be so", oh, oh, oh
But when she turns her back on the boy
He creeps up from behind
Bang, bang, Maxwell's silver hammer came down upon her head
Clang, clang, Maxwell's silver hammer made sure that she was dead
P.C. 31
Said "We've caught a dirty one"
Maxwell stands alone
Painting testimonial pictures, oh, oh, oh, oh
Rose and Valerie
Screaming from the gallery
Say "He must go free" ("Maxwell must go free")
The judge does not agree
And he tells them so, oh, oh, oh
But as the words are leaving his lips
A noise comes from behind
Bang, bang, Maxwell's silver hammer came down upon his head
Clang, clang, Maxwell's silver hammer made sure that he was dead
Silver hammer win